Yeah, this is really resonating for me -- both feeling that tremendous pressure to somehow deal elegantly when other people act in a way that's inappropriate or outright violent -- and also, unfortunately, responding awkwardly as an ally when the same thing happens to people I know.

I actually shared my sense of what you said with a colleague who deals with racism in her teaching experience, and it resonated for her, too. So your honesty helped me do a better job of being a colleague and friend to her. Thank you for that.

When I first read this, I thought -- I want my students to read it. It speaks so clearly to focusing on the wrong part of a problem.