Sometimes it's better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness

Holy shit, I'm reading a baseball newsletter I love, this edition full of silly questions like "What if two players on the same team who look similar, but one is fine (Hunter Renfroe) and one is maybe the best player of his generation (Mike Trout), pretended to be each other?" and "look at this guy making what's always a difficult throw with his wrong hand!"

And sandwiched between such fun nonsense, I was intrigued by this question because I'm also a fan of a meh team that'll likely just miss the playoffs:

I'm a Cubs fan, and this has been a particularly odd season (read: it sucks) for me from an emotional perspective.

If your team has bad results and is supposed to be bad (2022 Cubs), expectations are calibrated and it's easy to appreciate the season for what it is, invest in the prospects, etc. If your team has bad results and is supposed to be good (2019 Cubs), that's a tough one, but the experience is accessible and explicable. You have an identity! You have a right to be MAD (BULLPEN! MANAGER! INJURIES!)!

This season, after some high highs followed by some low lows, it's averaging out to a mid-talent level Cubs performing like a mid-level team. Which is frustrating. Inexplicably frustrating. They're close to being good, but not close enough to matter. And that's correct. And I'm finding myself having a hard time enjoying it at all, really.

How would you enjoy a season where a meh team, projected to just miss the playoffs, is performing exactly at expectations and will likely just miss the playoffs?

I was not expecting how hard this part of the answer would come for me!

The second approach is tougher. It does not come easily. But it's to accept the sadness, the boredom, the frustration, without judging those feelings. I'm not saying you should try to spin those into good emotions, the way you say you're able to in the hypothetical bad/bad and good/bad seasons; or even ignore them by shutting the team out of your mind. I mean that you can't outrun every hard emotion or bad expectation. When they come, it can be best to simply observe those emotions, be curious about them, know that they are temporary, let them be real. In fact, here’s the A3 advice box in today's New York Times, responding to you, personally!

People fare better when they accept their unpleasant emotions as appropriate and healthy, rather than trying to suppress them. When we perceive our emotions as bad, we pile more bad feelings onto our existing ones, which makes us feel worse. It's likely to increase the intensity of our negative feelings and the amount of time we suffer from them.

What I’m really saying is give yourself a break from the wanting; be sad without wanting to be not sad. Let your want muscles lie fallow for a season, and accept all of life.

I was just thinking this morning that I am trying to keep feeling my feelings but it's hard because I'm just sad all the time lately!

It's been a sad week.

Somehow it was only Monday, this week that I couldn't go see Elliot Page?

And the plans that didn't happen Tuesday night are what I'm missing today, because both D and I couldn't be away so long when one of us has to pin Gary down for his eyedrops (I've done it all five times today, and after he bit me on time #3 (only superficially but the adrenaline crash hit me hard and I was tearing up a lot recently even before that...), he has been very reactive ever since. Including as I update this at 1:30am, not having slept yet for this reason.

And as happy as I was to stay home with the puppy and not go to a movie I hate at the cinema on Wednesday, it is difficult not to feel after a while like fun things are for everyone but me! I didn't even listen to the Doof this week and that's an at-home activity! But I wasn't feeling it after my long day in London.

And next week...a friend asked me how my Thursday was looking and I just laughed bitterly: I knew she'd want a favor and I have a GP appointment for me and a vet appointment for Gary before I even start work, and a meeting for the thing I volunteer for after work...separate from the other meeting relating to that volunteering which I have on Monday night, sandwiched between work and D&D...and our D&D group meets virtually so that's 13 or so hours at the computer altogether.

A busy week is no guarantee of a nice weekend. A weekend sandwiched between two busy weeks no moreso. I was looking forward to seeing a friend tomorrow for a late celebration of her birthday, but I got my days wrong: she'd meant today, which would've been fine, but she wasn't well enough today. And that was it for my plans! It's hard to contemplate going on to another demanding week without some more nice things in between.